Since it is Friday the 13th and since my magical thinking requires that I give the day the superstitious honor it is due, I’ve decided it is time to share some news. My type of superstition means that I believe in these things—or not—if I feel like it or if it happens to benefit me. So I’m not a paraskevidekatriaphobic: a person afflicted with a morbid, irrational fear of Friday the 13th (Urban Legends About.com).
However, I do think the day sometimes brings out the crazies. Or maybe it’s more accurate to say it makes us do things we wouldn’t normally do on other days.
I recently read how my bloggy buddy Swati Bharteey shared the fantastic news of her engagement here. Then, some new developments in my life happened and created a Friday the 13th karmic soup.
Soooo…I want to tell you about the 279th Date.
It goes something like this.
I dated for eight years and learned more about myself then I ever imagined or dreamed was possible. Over that time, I went on many Internet first dates. Some involved men with snakes in their closets or dungeons in their basements. As happens when you date, I fell in love with a few and contemplated spending the rest of my life with them. However, I still was growing and changing.
I bought a house, got a Master’s Degree, PhD, and went on an odyssey that changed my life. My daughter grew into a beautiful young woman, and we became self-sufficient. I realized that I no longer needed a man to make my life complete. We were happy just the way we were.
The end.
Except that wasn’t the end. After that, I didn’t give up dating, but it just wasn’t necessary. Perhaps because of that, two years later I met a wonderful man.
I had the 279th Internet first date.
It was wonderful, and we fell in love.
The end.
But that’s not the end either. It’s still not easy, is it? Blending families and dealing with emotional difficulties of a teenager is not simple. I’ve been single a long time. So has he. Exes are hard. I’m a teacher-turned-writer who shares half my life with the world.
Perhaps more than that, I was a single, solo mother for more years than I’ve been anything else. It is what I know best and I became good at it. I’m also an expert at online dating, and sometimes I wonder where that leads me now that I’m not doing it anymore.
On the other hand, Date Number 279 should give all of you hope because what I’ve been saying actually works. Tenacity and the numbers game works. I know your struggles. I am here for you. As my sister Allyson said, you may have to kiss a lot of frogs, but there is a prince at the end.
My mom told me this story about when she had her baby who died. She had fallen down a flight of stairs shortly before giving birth so the baby was in trouble and died soon after being born. What was possibly the most painful was that, after Brian died before she even woke up from the anesthesia, the hospital personnel immediately transferred her out of the maternity ward. It was as if she was no longer a mother.
My experiences matter and I have so much to offer. I hope you’ll let me stay in the club even though I’ve found my prince. It’s the logical result of dating, at least that’s what they tell me.
Now—my Cute Single and Available (CSA) friend needs a date... Any takers?
copyright © 2010 Tiia Jones
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